Phobic or Philic, which are you?

The cold approach/seduction community has long been seen as a place where men do not espouse the idea of finding a girl to settle down with; attempting to sleep with a massive amount of women has always been the cure for "catching feelings" for these types of guys and anything less than a harem is a waste of effort. Why is that? Many men who get into this community have been disappointed with past relationships/marriages to the point where they no longer entertain the idea of any monogamous union. They would like to "play the field" and experience the variety of women that are out there. Interestingly enough, I agree that there is a point where this SHOULD be done. If you are a man who is prone to "falling in love" and finds yourself over-idealizing the women that are involved with you too quickly (like I was), the best thing for you is to locate the source of this tendency to over-attach so that you can fix this emotional problem, but also to date and spend time with as many different types of women as you can. The reasons are this: as men who over-attach, we tend to downplay our positives and the negatives of the women we attach to, and do the opposite with our negative traits and her positive ones. Being with a variety of women allows you to see past the "beauty" trap, understanding that just because a woman looks like a model does not mean that she's actually worth spending time with. It allows you to see yourself as a man who, after working hard to improve himself and his cold approach skills, can get any type of girl he is interested in and is worthy of being with the women that excite and enliven him the most.

However, this is not the best path for guys bitten by the bug of "more girls is always better". There are many guys in this space who, for the reason of popular thinking behind relationships or having suffered some bad ones in the past, do not believe in romantic involvement at all. These men should absolutely aim to settle down and try having one girl in their lives. Contrary to popular belief, it might make life a whole lot easier and simpler than having to split time, attention and energy between other girls. Relationship-phobia is just that: a disease of mind. Yes, relationships take work, time, and require some of your focus to start and maintain, but you might also take on a girl that is your biggest cheerleader, who knows how to buoy your spirits in hard times, and who inspires you to bring your best to life by just being around her for any length of time. It's no secret that many men that have risen to great heights in the world have only done so at the touch of a woman that moved them, stirred their souls and imaginations, giving them the energy to conquer any obstacles in their way. Don't miss out on the beautiful gift that a loving relationship can bring for the sake of being dogmatic. Try it, you may find you like it more than you thought you could.