Attractive and Lonely (Counter-Intuitive Lessons From The Field, Pt. 1)

The more attractive she is, the lonelier she often is.

Contrary to popular belief, the most attractive girls do NOT have the most options NOR do guys proposition them. The vast majority of men who see a "model-quality" girl are stewing in their insecurity, too afraid of looking like a loser to ever give themselves a chance with this type of girl. If most men even THINK about talking to an intimidating girl (based on how beautiful she is), every insecurity they've ever had, every negative piece of self-talk comes gushing up, ready to give him reasons not to even look in her direction. This doesn't just occur with "so-so" men, either. There are guys out there who would be incredible matches for her who continually think, "if I could only get a couple more thousands in the bank account/a stronger 6-pack/ a bigger house/ a personal chef, etc., then I would be ready and able to talk to a girl like that!" It's all too common for men to put her on a pedestal, not realizing that she's a human being just like them. She gets sick, has bad days, has insecurities of her own, is looking for love and acceptance like everyone else.

It's actually even harder for her to make friends because she makes other girls jealous with her looks, and harder for her to meet men because she intimidates them all the time.

This translates to average-looking girls actually taking the lion's share of the options BECAUSE they are not intimidating and men feel no fear propositioning them for sex. This is also why the crabbiest girls that you will approach, be it in groups or solo, are the more average looking girls because they get hit up all the time by guys. Go out to a club or bar and see for yourself: the average man clamors about drunkenly hitting on the "unattractive" average girls but wouldn't dare risk his ego talking to girls attractive enough to intimidate him. How hot a man thinks a girl is is correlated directly to how much fear he has of speaking to her, usually. This, again, means that even qualified men remove themselves from the running out of fear that they won't measure up.

"Hot" girls can barely find a guy who won't pass out as soon as she says a word to him so they tend to latch onto solid men that they meet and stay in relationships or "situationships" longer. The added pressure and difficulty in finding a mate for attractive girls also leads them to get involved with unsavory guys who aren't really good for them. If the wrong type of guy is the only one with balls enough to talk to her, she's likely to go with what's available to her.

All of this is to say that only time and experience tell the truth about what goes on in field, and that if you're actively working on your skill set with women primarily, and yourself in general, you should be confident in your ability to go up to the women you want and make things happen. Give yourself a chance.